There once was an owner of a large estate who cultivated a large vineyard. The Landowner prided himself on being a master vintner, a skill he acquired over many years. One season, at the appropriate time, after the harvest, the owner was ready to release his latest vintage of wine, which he deemed the finest product of all his years of wine making. In effort to celebrate and promote the new wine, the master vintner decided to host an exquisite dinner and invite guests to taste the wine for the first time. He spared no expense in his preparations and enthusiastically made invitations to the banquet.
The guest list included two prominent businessmen each owning acreage on either side of his own. They were his nearest neighbors and also vine growers. They, in turn, brought a guest of their choice: one his wife, and the other his girlfriend. The local Bishop, whose authority was as widespread as the vines that draped the countryside, was invited as well, as the Landowner’s estate fell into his diocese. He brought his deputy, a young, ordained priest, newly out of seminary. In addition, the two most reputable wine critics of the region were included for their expert assessment. Finally, a young woman, a distant cousin of the Landowner was included in the invitation. She had arrived unexpectedly, travelling by backpack through the wine country, looking for a place to stay. Her stay on the estate was of an indefinite duration. Nine guests total plus himself made it a party of ten.
The evening of the party arrived. As the final details for the banquet were being made and the house prepared to receive the guests, the master vintner surprised his staff by announcing that he himself would be the sommelier and server for the dinner and tasting. He planned to attend the feast, but only in an expert disguise, so even his family, his neighbors and his priest would not recognize him.
The guests arrived on time, except for the young woman, and greeted each other cordially in the salon, while waiting for their host. Given the news that the host was detained, they were ushered into the dining room at exactly the top of the hour. It was just at this moment the young woman joined the group. She was dressed rather too informally for the occasion and her hair was still damp from showering, but a pleasant fragrance accompanied her as she rushed in. The excitement and anticipation grew in the guests, as they entered the lavish dining hall that sparkled from every angle. Candlelight reflected from every surface – from guilt sconces on the walls, silver candlesticks on the side buffets and center table, through the crystal prisms hanging from the chandelier, and off the gold-rimmed table setting. Light refracted through the crystal glasses on the table, casting a web of kaleidoscopes along the glossy surface. The room was resplendent.
Each guest was seated according to designated place cards. Settling into their chairs, the guests greeted their dinner companions on either side, initiating pleasant if not tentative conversation, like dancers on a ballroom floor, first one initiating, then the other, both willing to being drawn into the spinning motion and mood of the evening. Meanwhile, the first course was served with the first pairing of wine. The Vintner, artfully dressed and disguised, filled each glass, and quietly receded into the background, all the while observing every move, every reaction, every expression of his guests, discerning their response to the wine. The Vintner was doing his own dance of sorts with the waiters, as they moved in sync about the room gracefully adding and subtracting plates of food and new glasses of wine. The evening was fully underway, just as the Vintner had planned.
During the service of the six courses, for that is how many varieties of wine were to be served, the Vintner carefully observed his guests. The two businessmen seated next to each other became engaged in an animated discussion about politics. They sipped from their glasses with a distracted, inattentive manner, more interested in the intellectual debate they had raised between themselves. The politics at hand played a role in their pocketbook. The two women, who accompanied them, seemed to know each other well, and were accustomed to entertaining themselves. They chatted easily, mostly about their own attire and accessories, which were appropriately lavish for the occasion. They hardly touched their wine, though they did greatly admire the crystal glasses. There is a certain pleasure in holding fine crystal in one’s hand and bringing the thin rim to one’s lips.
Next to women, seated approximately halfway down the table across from each other, were the Bishop and his Deputy. The Bishop was somewhat irritated with his table placement. The two women to his right were too occupied with themselves and the young woman to his left was engaged by the wine critics, at present. He had been seated next to no one of consequence. (Plus, it is hard to sit in the middle.) With resignation and in dutiful decorum, he engaged his Deputy, across the table, with a rather complex and disjointed theological conversation, having to speak rather loudly over the table and through the flower arrangements. The young Deputy did not touch his wine, for propriety’s sake. The Bishop drank the first glass, but also being very self-aware, abstained from the successive offerings.
At the far end of the table sat the two wine critics. They now had moved on from the young woman’s unsophisticated charms and were deeply engaged in the tasting of the wine. Each held their respective glasses up to the light to study the color. They swirled the wine gently, so it lapped the edges of the glass, allowing the tannins to drip down the sides. They breathed in deeply the bouquet, with eyes closed, allowing their olfactory senses to be filled, then quickly noting to each other their first impressions. With each sip, they swirled the wine in their mouths, flushing it through their teeth, around their gums and over their tongues, and finally swallowing it. Both critics discussed the texture, balance, structure of the wine. They were very engaged. One even took a small notebook out of his pocket to jot down some notes.
The young woman was left to herself most of the night. In the end, no one at the table was really interested in her adventuresome travels, and she was rather unskilled at the polite table protocol. She found herself alone with her food and the wine. She drank everything put in front of her, which helped to make her a little chattier with the Bishop, which he did not appreciate. She found the wine immensely enjoyable. It made her lightheaded but warm-hearted. The Vintner was quick to fill her glass. All the while, he served and watched everyone, taking his own mental notes.
After the final course of dessert and the corresponding Sauternes were served, the guests – tired from food and conversation – were folding their napkins and preparing to adjourn. Suddenly, the door to the dining room burst open, and the Landowner surprised his guests with his late appearance, now dressed fully recognizably. With excessive apologies, he joined the table. Somewhat dismayed by the evident delay in their departure, the guests turned their attention to their host. He asked them each how they enjoyed their evening, though he already knew. It was a rather punishing stunt, to delay them so at that hour, and to ask them to reflect meaningfully on each of the wines. But his enthusiasm and vigor persisted. Only the wine experts gave a reasoned reply, but they became overly technical in their response. The girl, alone, seemed to supply what he was looking for. A little tipsy by the end, she was flirting with the young waiter, while he refreshed her glass, one more time.
Finally relenting, and having mercy on his guests, the Landowner arose. Relief was exhaled in the room, as he stood. Again, inclined to surprises, he made an announcement. It was his plan to give the rights of ownership of the new vintage to one of them present. To whom shall he give it? To the neighboring landowners, experienced in grape growing and good stewards of property? To the women, valuable promoters through their social networks? To the Bishop and his Deputy, consecrators of wine? To the experts whose knowledge overshadows their enjoyment? Or to the one who actually drank it all in?
What would you do?
So, this is just a fun parable of my own making. Jesus always ended his parables by asking questions, so I’ll do the same, though I haven’t been very secretive about my own answers. If we are guests at the banquet, as many of Jesus’ parables suggest,
- Where are you seated? By whom would like to sit?
- Are you one of the characters or another unmentioned guest?
- What do you notice about the scene?
- What or whom has your attention?
- What rings true about the scene?
- If the kingdom of God is like new wine, (Luke 5:37-38) how do you receive it?
- If Jesus is pouring, what do you think “new wine” is?